Six ways to Forgiveness

I read an article today about forgiveness - six reasons to forgive, and not one of them is about "feeling like it" or "wanting to". Truly, God understands the human heart, and our capacity for resentment - we don't want to forgive, and need many reminders and outright commands to do so.

Action changes thought. As we act: forgiving, loving, lazy, helpful, selfish, thankful, etc so we will become. Habits are.. habit forming. I suppose I know what I want to be, but I have to start by actually doing it. Knowledge leads to action leads to habit. Feelings come last, trailing along in the wake of habits. If I wait until I "feel like" forgiving - I'll never do it. Yet when I force myself to forgive, resentfully, unwillingly, and when I get past the anger and let go of resentment - amazing! I find the peace, health and joy that God wanted to bless me with all along!

Funny, how when we live according to God's will, life really does go better - and yet I have to try it my own way over and over, before acknowledging who knows best. Sigh. I never thought I was such a stupid person.

We are sent...

If we truly believe we are the beloved and chosen children of God, truly believe that our lives are to be lived for the love of Him and others, truly believe we are sent with a message - this should be a life-changing realization! Our lives are to be a lived-out message to the world of God's love and desire for reconciliation. What a mission! What a purpose! To be a prophet of God - every one of us - speaking His message to everyone we meet, bringing people to understand their Maker, partaking of God's own work and participating in bringing His will to pass on the earth. What an amazing calling! (How could I forget this? Lose sight of this? And yet I do...)

Searching for God

It is strange that a little of God makes me want more. When I am really and truly in touch with Him, I never want it to end - why are those times so rare? A little bit of goodness, holiness, patience or virtue both makes me want more and makes me realize how little I have. Maybe goodness is addictive? Maybe God has to "introduce" us to goodness before we can appreciate it? Rather like an "acquired taste".

Interesting to note that the opposite also applies. The more I wallow in cynicism, despair and laziness, the more I want to continue in it. If I ignore a conviction for long enough, it goes away! My heart is so fickle - it is vitally important what I feed it on!

Having experienced the joys of forgiveness (briefly, yesterday) I actually asked God to give me more opportunities to practice forgiveness - then I realized what I was asking for! Opportunities to forgive only come with insults or injury - do I really want more of that? I suppose I do, if that is the price for spiritual growth. Strange - I never thought I'd say that.

Loving God: our first duty

Loving God is our first duty - why do I feel so blah about that? I can remember a time, not so long ago, when I couldn't shut up about God, and offended people by talking about Him all the time - when did I lose that fire? After all, God has made the world with plenty of opportunities to love Him! There is so much in this world to praise Him for - hands, flowers, mountains, waterfalls, stars, butterflies, the miracle of the immune system, dance, chocolate, etc.

I think I have let church politics and church disappointments flavour my faith journey. I need to get back to the cross, not just as a symbol of the faith, or the church, or religion, but of Jesus' love for me and willingness to sacrifice himself for my sake. When did I get so used to that idea that I forgot how special it made me feel when I first heard about it?

Love of God and others

Compassion again - how quickly I get exhausted in my ability to love and help and serve others! I thought I was a pretty nice person, but after a whole week of trying to tame my tongue and rein in my temper (only two resolutions) I am exhausted, frustrated and can't decided if I'd prefer a good whinge or a good cry. I just know I need something to relieve my feelings. (Why didn't I think of prayer and calling on God? Hmm.)

Compassion - how quickly I become numbed and desensitized to the pain of others. I think it comes from watching the news, and hearing endlessly about disasters beyond my ability to help, so that I become paralysed and helpless even in the face of suffering that I can help. Or am I just too selfish to look beyond my own backyard? I don't want to think too much about that - I need to talk to Deb again - she gives me a sense of perspective about the world which I can't seem to find on my own yet.

Temptation

I think my overwhelming temptation is to anger - I can be a very angry person, but I usually express it in more socially acceptable ways, such as frustration. Somehow it is better to be frustrated or slightly offended (implies a moral superiority) than it is to be simply angry. By anger I would include both the quick kind which says nasty things on the spur of the moment, and the slow kind of anger which smoulders into bitterness and resentment. Not pretty.

Unfortunately, recognizing temptation is not much of a solution. Just knowing that I get angry easily doesn't really help me overcome it, since it just makes me more annoyed to know that on top of everything else I am now sinning as well!

I think the only way to combat temptation to sin, is to fill myself up with other things: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control. Whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent or praisworthy - think about these things, and then put them into practice!

Giving what has been Given

God has given us already that which matters most: our centre, our being. We are not valued for what we do - such a prevalent thought in our "productive society" where the first question we ask each new acquaintance "So, what do you do?". We are not what we have, though others may judge us that way.

God has given us what we need, placed us where we are, and we have His purpose and strength to sustain us to do His work. My labour is a small response to His work on my behalf, my virtues (such as they are) a small reflection of His goodness, my evils a small and fading stain on His workmanship.

“And all the wickedness in this world that man might work or think, is no more to the mercy of God than a live coal in the sea.” William Langland,1330-1400

Only when he frees us are we free, and only then can we truly love others and help others. We are freed for our good and the good of others, not because we deserve it but because we need it.