What does God like?

I have been thinking over the Christmas period of how easily we sometimes say "Oh, God will understand" or "God will forgive me" for this or that. I agree that it is probably true - God's mercy is able to forgive a great many things. But is that really the point?

God has given us guidelines, principles, laws, commandments, ideals and one living example. We know what is best for us, what God has ordained for us, what God requires of us and even why:

Micah 6:8 He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

He has graced us with not only instructions, but the reason why these instructions were given. If we choose not to do what is good, does it matter that God will understand, or that God will forgive us? He will, but we will still have to live with the consequences of our choices. If we knowingly choose what is not good for us, how can we then complain that we don't have what is good? Perhaps we should rather say:

Hebrews 12:11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on,
however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have
been trained by it.

Smoke...

Smoke. Thick, white, choking smoke hangs over the whole city, probably over most of the state. The bushfires in this exceptionally hot drought year are storming out of control across eastern Victoria. Firefighters are doing their best, but the weather predictors are saying there will not be a heavy rain to put out the fires for another five months. One person has already been killed, several injured. Millions of dollars worth of property has been destroyed. The news is full of nothing else, and if we could forget what was going on, even for a moment, just looking out the window would remind us. The smoke is still here, hundreds of kilometres away.

In the meantime, shopping for Christmas continues.

It seems odd, perhaps even obscene, that despite the ruination and death taking place at the other end of the state, that here we are ignoring the smoke and doing Christmas shopping. We can go to bars, have coffee, window-shop and try on shoes just as if it were a normal day. Why not?

Besides, what else is there to do? I am not a firefighter, not an environmental planner, not a bush or fire expert. People are not yet in need of doctors, of emergency relief or accommodation. The reality is that there is nothing for me to do for them.

So I continue my Christmas shopping. And every time I look at the sky, at the obscured and dulled sun, I pray for rain. Lord, you send your sun and your rain on the just and the unjust. Send us now the rain...

Update on progress on Clomid (or lack thereof...)

Well, my sensitivity to alcohol, caffeine and other substances seems to be holding true for Clomid as well. Peter started me on the lowest dose, which is only half of the usual recommended starting dose. I told him straight away that I want to have children, but not twins!

So on only 25mg I appear to be ovulating fine. This means that on the mornings I take the tablets I have to crack each one in half, which usually results in a whole lot of white powder all over the kitchen bench. I have started doing it on a plate, because that makes it a whole lot easier to lick up the spilled powder...

But despite two successful ovulatory cycles, we don't appear to be getting any forwarder. Maybe I was unrealistically optimistic, thinking that as soon as we started getting treatment we would start seeing results. I guess life doesn't work that way.

To look on the bright side though, it means that I can eat and drink whatever I like over the Christmas period. It is only those suffering pregnancy who have to be careful and conscientious. Alcohol, seafood, soft cheeses and pate are all allowed for us footloose and fancy-free childless types!

Exploring Orthodoxy 2

As part of my "Orthodox journey" I have started corresponding with some Orthodox people from a bulletin board about Orthodoxy I found on the web. This has been both interesting and off-putting.

It is definitely interesting to see how many Orthodox seem to be converts from other denominations. Some have clearly thought deeply and hard about their spiritual journey and have (as I see it) given up many of the freedoms of the modern church to align themselves with the traditional church. More of these are men than women, of the ones I have met so far. I don't think this is coincidence. It is good to see so many people of great spiritual insight and depth, who have really thought about their faith are a part of Orthodoxy. To tell the truth, I was a little surprised. I guess I have been hanging around too many "nominal Orthodox" who take a cultural view of the whole thing, rather than seeing Orthodoxy as a genuine spiritual way of life. Who view "being orthodox" as part of "being Greek" and something to be clung to and defended as part of a cultural heritage, rather than as something with value in its own right.

The off-putting part is the attitude of the orthodox (in general) towards the rest of us (called the "heterodox"). This attitude is condescending, dismissive and uninterested. The answer to nearly my questions so far has been, in essence "because the Fathers say so" or "because it has always been done that way" and especially "you don't understand because you are not Orthodox" and "if you don't like it you don't have to join".

Now that is a Catch-22!
- you don't understand because you don't have the "mind" of the Orthodox
- you don't like it because you don't understand it
- if you don't like it, don't join
- unless you join, you can't have the mind of the Orthodox...

This seems to justify an attitude of complacency toward evangelism and of self-satisfaction with the status quo. The Orthodox church sees no need to make itself open, available or relevant to those in the society around it, because "if they are called by the Holy Spirit, they will come" - this despite the self-evident barriers against any such calling!

I also find it interesting to notice how many who converted to Orthodoxy saying that they "just knew" as soon as they walked into their first Orthodox church that they were among those "called". I guess that must mean that I am not...

Visiting the Orthodox in their own habitat... (pt 2)

So I went to the Antiochian Orthodox service. It was strange. The music and chanting which sets my teeth on edge in the Greek churches is exactly the same in English, only weirder because the syllables have to be stretched to fit the chants. The music is horrible and apparently hasn't changed for over a thousand years. It could do with a change, in my opinion.

Some of the prayers were great, though. Really well-thought and sincerely written. I think I like John Chrysostom. Some of it was very familiar from the Anglican service as well, presumably the good old C of E "lifted" quite a bit of it from the Orthodox, I assume. It doesn't matter - it is all good stuff.

I was a bit shocked by the whole communion thing. I didn't take it of course, not being Orthodox, but the bread is crumbled into the wine and then the whole shebang given to parishoners on a spoon. The same spoon which goes into everyone else's mouth! I saw a mother rushing up with her baby to be first in line, and I don't blame her at all. I bet people with colds don't wait until last either! I don't think I would have wanted communion, even if I were eligible.

After the service, the priest recognized me immediately (probably the only visitor) and introduced me to a few people. Of course, the first thing they all asked me was "Why are you here?". Unfortunately, I didn't get to meet any women at all. I felt a little uncomfortable just talking to some of the men.

So overall, pretty much what I had expected from attending Easter services over the last ten or so years. Will I visit again? Probably. Will I become Orthodox? Unlikely.

Visiting the Orthodox in their own habitat...

After many very annoying phone calls to the Greek Orthodox community, diocese and other organizations I have given up on them. It is impossible to find anyone who speaks English (or even thinks that this could be a desirable skill) or who is interested in talking to anyone. The first question my every enquiry was met with "Why are you interested?" that is, the ones who didn't assume that I was enquiring about Greek language lessons.

When I finally made the connection with someone who spoke English and who knew what I was on about, he finally admitted that there are two English-speaking service-conducting priests in the whole of Melbourne, and no English-speaking parish at all. He seemed to feel that an English service is a necessary evil which was ordered by the church authorities and therefore must be carried out, even if the whole thing is a pointless exercise...

So, I visited the local Antiochian Orthodox community instead. The Antiochian church has the rather encouraging official position that services should be conducted in the vernacular of the place they are held! Amazing! The priest was very encouraging, and invited me to come whenever I wanted. It is also very convenient that the first weekend I am free to go, they are relocating to the chapel at Monash University - I could practically walk there, if I wasn't always so late on a Sunday morning. So, it should be interesting to finally work out what everyone has been saying!

Exploring Orthodoxy 1

Since the Greece trip, I have had a bit of an interest in exploring Greek Orthodoxy. There is something attractive about joining the tradition which goes right back to Jesus, the historical church which is the "ground and pillar of our faith" as they say. There is something reassuring and stable about the traditions which go back thousands of years, about a faith and a creed which have not changed.

I do have some hesitations though, about the elevation of what seems to be "tradition" over what seems to be the guidance of the inspired Holy Spirit? I can't help wondering if some of the man-made "rules" (which is what the tradition amounts to) are actually hinderances rather than helpful? And I wonder a lot about a church which claims to have "not changed" in two thousand years, but which obviously has acquired the accretions and trappings of a patriarchal culture along the way?

Apart from those hesitations, the major one I have is the relative authority given to tradition, even when it seems (to me) to be in opposition with either the Bible or with current culture. I know this is a totally Protestant way of looking at the whole issue, but I can't help that. If I had "the Mind of the Orthodox Church" then I would be able to just accept it all on authority, but since I obviously don't, then I can't.

The final problem of "tradition" as I see it, is that if it serves no particular function and if it gets in the way - why keep it? Apparently some of the vestments of the Orthodox priest haven't changed in nearly a thousand years. So? I don't see a current need to dress like that, and I think it alienates people for priests to look weird. I am told repeatedly that it is not "Orthodox" to think and speak like that - that Orthodoxy will not change to accommodate current ideas.

I think that is a major problem. Any church which will not even consider current social ideas and norms, which allows itself to become so estranged from mainstream society that it can't even talk to people - this is a problem. This is what I see in the modern Greek Orthodox church - a church which is so far removed from the current generation that it has nothing but rebukes for them for not being what it wants. A generation which is so estranged from the church that it feels the church has nothing to offer. A dialogue which is in two different languages and never the twain shall meet! A huge opportunity being lost...