This is a very interesting article about a philosophy of evangelism:

http://www.youthspecialties.com/articles/topics/recreation/entertained_to_death.php

I think it is a symptom of living in a pluralistic world, where the church is afraid to teach it as it is, and instead relies on "marketing techniques" to appeal to people. People brought into the church by the appeal of prosperity gospel teaching are not necessarily going to like being told to reform their lives, bear the yoke of persecution and engage in social justice.

When Jesus taught, he was not afraid to say up-front that the way of following Him demands personal sacrifice. It wasn't in the fine print of the contract, it was on the front page. No-one could ever say to Jesus that they were disappointed that they weren't getting their needs met, yet I think this happens quite often in the modern church. Is the problem in the structure of the church in meeting needs, or is the problem the expectation that the church should meet all our needs?

Today I got a message to return to my roots

Today I was visiting the York St Church of Christ in Ballarat - great place! - and I felt God present and speaking to me in a way which I haven't felt for a long time. I suddenly realized that this is what I have been missing. I have been praying and going to church intermittently, sometimes in Melbourne and sometimes here, and I have nothing regular or stable in my spiritual life. I have been praying for guidance and not hearing anything specific, probably because I have no room in my lift to listen.

It occurs to me that I have lost my old enthusiasm for the spiritual disciplines of Bible study, regular fasting and prayer, but not replaced them with anything else. The search for new and interesting forms of spirituality is all very well, but I feel that to have God as a constant presence in my life, I need to put aside regular time and attention to listen for Him.

I don't think it is fair or reasonable to come to God only in times of crisis and ignore Him otherwise. (Even if He would allow it, and He might, it would not be optimal for my own spiritual growth.) I want to listen for/to God every day, and I feel sure that He will have something to say!

So here's the plan: I will buy a new study Bible and read it every day and make notes in the margins or on looseleaf in the pages (can't think without a pen in my hand). The experiment begins next week, after I get to a bookshop...

How best to hear the Spirit?

Last Sunday at Solace we had an exercise in listening for the Holy Spirit. There were lots of other groups doing other things, but that's what I was doing. I found it difficult to concentrate with all the ambient noise and put my hands over my ears in order to focus on my thoughts and not get distracted. It was then that the thought occurred to me - is putting my hands over my ears in church the best way to hear God?

I started wondering how else I block out the sounds around me which could be the voice of God? I then wondered how would be the best way to listen for the Spirit?

- I think the first thing has to be to ask Him to come, and to listen for what He says when He does speak. Hands over ears are out!
- Try to listen with an open mind - no-one hears the answers they don't want to hear, as I know well.
- Perhaps knowing what He has done and how would be helpful? This would mean listening to testimonies, reading biographies, reading the Bible to find out what He has done in the past and for other people.
- At the same time, being open for Him to speak and act in different or unexpected ways. For all that the Holy Spirit lives inside every believer, I still find Him the most un-knowable of the Trinity.
- Since He is within and around us all the time, try to see Him in the world and in daily life. I think "retreating" to find God should not always be necessary if we can manage to be intentional in ordinary times and places.

Further points as they come to hand!

Last night I saved a life

It is the moments like this which remind me why I chose to do medicine, and paediatrics in particular. Some days it seems like all I do is hand out Ritalin and reassurance, but every now and then I really feel like I made a difference to someone's life.

I got the call at a quarter to four in the morning (never my best time) but it was obviously a delivery I needed to be there for, especially since the person calling was my previous resident and knew what he was about. It is always a judgement call as to how much the person on the other end of the phone knows about the condition and what confidence it is possible to place in their opinion, but in this case I knew it would be the real deal.

I always like going to deliveries; all the pain and blood are washed away in joy the moment the baby cries. I suppose the parents must get tired of the sound after a while, but that first cry is always miraculous.

Unfortunately this baby had no cry at birth, being pale and floppy and without a heart rate. We went all out working on him, with tubes down his throat and artificial breathing - in these cases I don't stop to think, I just know what has to be done - and six minutes later he was pink and crying.

Strangely enough, I didn't really think about what we do until the resident pointed out - Wow! He was born with no breathing or heart beat and I thought he was dead and you saved him!

It was only then that I thought - Hey yeah, so I did!

Lord, Change Me

This is a book by Evelyn Christenson which is speaking to me at the moment. It follows my earlier thoughts about living with the sound off, and also talks about living and doing what we believe, rather than thinking, writing or talking about it.

If (as James tells us) faith which is not lived out in actions dies, what does this mean for our highly cerebral and literate society? For our intellectual faith? For our belief-based church? For my faith, which mainly takes place in my thoughts and writing? Where does all this thought-life find a way to express itself in action? How does God actually do things through me in the world? Speaking and witnessing is all very well, but am I God's hands in the world, as well as words?

6 Reasons why being married is like riding a tandem bicycle

Dean and I ride with him in front (Captain) and me on the back (Stoker) but I realize that others may make different arrangements. This works for us.

1. Only one person can be the Captain at the time. The Stoker is equally important but the roles are not the same. Either person can fill either role by mutual agreement, but if the Stoker thinks the Captain is making a mistake she can't just spontaneously take over!

2. The Captain makes the final decision. The Captain has control of the steering and can see the road and the traffic and is therefore responsible for the direction of the couple. The Stoker can give advice, persuasion and back massages, but the final responsibility rests with the Captain.

3. The Stoker makes no mistakes. The Captain would do well to remember this, since it depends critically on Rule 2. The Stoker can't see the road or the traffic as well as the Captain and takes no responsibility for the final decision.

4. The Stoker has to trust the Captain and do what he says (see rule 2). If he says STOP! then the Stoker should do so. (Explanations may be necessary afterwards.) Trying to peer over his shoulder will only unbalance you both.

5. The Stoker should never say "I told you so". The Captain is doing his best, and if a decision turns out not perhaps as well as it might have done, be assured that he is aware of that without any need for a reminder.

6. The Stoker's contribution is unseen and perhaps seems unappreciated, but if she stops pedalling, both will slow down. You are in this together!

Listening to the Holy Spirit

Listening to the Holy Spirit takes several different skills. I think the first is being open to what He is trying to say. (I wonder if this is also the hardest part?) Then there is being intentional and setting aside time and mental space to listen. I think we are also expected to do some of our own 'legwork' and to be familiar with the instructions from God already given to us in the Bible and not keep asking for confirmation of what we already know we should do - I would call this a form of rebellion rather like a child whining "Do I really have to?".

Despite asking for guidance for the last few weeks, I still do not have a clear picture of where I am going. Is this because I am not listening right? Or is the Holy Spirit telling me to wait? Or is He speaking and I'm not hearing? Or am I blocking out what I am hearing?

Learning to listen - it is harder than it sounds!